Feeling Restless

The closer we get to getting our RV and hitting the road, the more restless and anxious I become. We are now just a few weeks from our goal. You would think that I would be motivated and overjoyed, but that isn’t how my unruly brain works. It might be better if this whole thing was just sprung on me at the last minute.

If you have read my previous blog posts then you know about my depression and anxiety. It is the reason that I became so convinced that getting an RV and getting on the road was the life for us. Sitting, staring at these four walls just isn’t the life that I want anymore. I literally cannot live this way anymore. Paying bills to keep the stuff, the cars, the house or whatever else, until you die just isn’t for me any longer. I want to break free! (channeling Queen)

So what is taking so long? Well, money for one thing. It is impossible for people like us, with our mountain of debt and bad credit score, to just walk onto an RV lot and walk away with an RV. We are, like so many other Americans, waiting for our tax refund. We cannot make this move or purchase this vehicle without it. So, we are prisoners of the IRS at the moment. A new law standing in our way, slowing down the process.

But we will get it and we will get out of here. It is only a matter of weeks. Now someone explain that to my brain…

The other reason that we cannot just pack up and go, is work. My husband received multiple calls back on jobs in Washington state, but they all require him to come in to do a formal interview. Apparently no one has ever heard of Skype. He is now doing Uber in the meantime alongside his full time job so that we have a little extra to save. But also, so we have a back up if it takes a while before he is hired in Washington. The whole situation is nerve-wracking! We have to move to a new state that is across the US from us, without the guarantee of a job waiting there. So being smart and not rushing this is vital to our success.

So, regardless if it happens in a few weeks or a few months, I will be here waiting. Anxiously, of course. But I will be ok, and we will meet our goal to live a better life.